Personal Development Forum, Self Help Forum, Mind warrior forum

Author Topic: What Really makes You Happy?  (Read 1142 times)

Offline ameritor

What Really makes You Happy?
« on: September 13, 2013, 07:34:26 AM »
Hi All,

living in Africa, I see a lot of people that are economically challenged.
Strange thing is, that a lot of them have some of the best smiles around.

They, in their less educated state, seem happier than some 1st world country people.

Any ideas Why?

For instance, near where I live, there was a man building sand sculptures on the beach.
The first thing I noticed when I saw him, was a big toothy grin and a cheery Hello.

I greeted him back and looked at his sand sculpture, which he was building hoping to get small donations from passersby. He seemed really happy.

Only when I got closer, did I notice that his right arm was a twisted shriveled mess. Obviously some hideous injury, had rendered it totally useless. He was doing all the sculpting and working solely with his left hand.

I was impressed. Till I saw, that his left foot was also crippled, making it difficult for him to even walk.
Yet he carried the sand up, and spent hours sculpting it, hoping to get a few pennies, for food.

Yet he seemed happy.

I (and most of us actually) would have crawled into a corner and been miserable.

What is his secret?

Offline wrcato2

Re: What Really makes You Happy?
« Reply #1 on: September 13, 2013, 08:41:30 PM »
Everybody will make the best of life's circumstances, no matter what bodily problems one has. I myself am deaf in my right ear, have been since birth. I can't hear like others do. Music is alright but I would rather listen to talk radio because I am also tone deaf. I can't hear stereo sound. 

I get by. So does the guy on the beach. He does what he likes to do and obviously has a talent. Would he have pursued that talent had his arm and leg been normal. Probably not.

He might have seen this story http://davidmarquet.com/2012/06/inspirational-stories-john-fopp/
I first heard about john fopp while reading Ziglers book over the top.

Offline ameritor

Re: What Really makes You Happy?
« Reply #2 on: September 14, 2013, 01:21:04 AM »
Hi wrcato2

I agree that having afflictions and coping with them is a relevant step. And that is just the point I was trying to make.

Being happy despite of your circumstances.

I can assure you that the man on the beach, has had no exposure to anything that we have access to.
He probably lives in a shed somewhere without even electricity.

So is he ignorant of what he could have? Is that his secret?

Or does he have an inner resolution/insight/..... that makes the difference.

If he does, what is it, and how can we also get it to increase our happiness?

Offline JonRhodesUK

Re: What Really makes You Happy?
« Reply #3 on: September 14, 2013, 01:46:47 AM »
I think a lot of happiness comes from spending time with other people. I lived in Morocco for a while and have seen this first hand. People have to look after one another more as they are economically challenged. They have larger families living together, and help each other out.

They also can't afford as much entertainment, so they spend more time with each other laughing and joking. This is actually more fun than going for an expensive meal for example.
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Offline SuccessfulPG

Re: What Really makes You Happy?
« Reply #4 on: September 21, 2013, 12:08:46 PM »
WOW - How nice and refreshing it is to come onto a forum where the stories are positive, or at least full of hope.  :)

I think I'm really going to enjoy participating on here.

Mark
SUCCESSFUL PERSONAL GROWTH - THE FUTURE OF PERSONAL DEVELOPMENT : http://www.successfulpersonalgrowth.com

Offline TimCStar

Re: What Really makes You Happy?
« Reply #5 on: September 26, 2013, 11:18:31 PM »
Happiness is our natural state.  We have it programmed out of us from a very early age.  After that, we learn to keep reinforcing that program, by watching the news, sharing complaints with friends and associates, etc.

I suspect that people with disabilities are taught that they should feel sorry for themselves, just as minority groups in the US are taught to feel that they deserve special treatment.

"So is he ignorant of what he could have? Is that his secret?"  Possibly.  If you have as much as the next guy, I think it's easier to feel content.

"Or does he have an inner resolution/insight/..... that makes the difference."  Possibly.  Being happy is a choice.  He could easily have simply decided he was going to find ways to enjoy his life.  It's quite possible that he made that choice BEFORE he started doing sand sculptures, and that's what the Universe delivered to him.

"If he does, what is it, and how can we also get it to increase our happiness?"  The only way to know what it is would be to ask him.  Talk to him.  Find out what his story is.  I guarantee you're far more affected by his condition than he is.  If you find him to be interesting, I'd suggest asking to record an interview.  You might come away with something really interesting.

www.whatsyourpath.com - Personal blog

Offline ameritor

Re: What Really makes You Happy?
« Reply #6 on: September 27, 2013, 01:39:43 PM »
Hi ,

Asking might seem like an obvious solution. It does however present some issues.

Firstly his English is very bad. Secondly, approaching someone and saying "why are you happy", might just trigger a feeling of him questioning himself, and open up a whole can of worms.

Something, that I definitely don't want on my conscience.

Anyway, the whole post was intended to open up a discussion as to what the forum members think the secrets to happiness is - somewhat of a philosophical question if you will. His particular case, was just an observation, and not a problem needing to be solved.

The real interest I think would be a list of thoughts, that are beliefs towards happiness, rather than one individuals' circumstances.

Offline TimCStar

Re: What Really makes You Happy?
« Reply #7 on: September 27, 2013, 02:22:47 PM »
Hi ameritor,


I wasn't suggesting a solution to anything.  Sorry if that's how it came across.  I just see an opportunity to talk with someone who has what others want.  He could turn out to have real insights into your question.



www.whatsyourpath.com - Personal blog

Offline ameritor

Re: What Really makes You Happy?
« Reply #8 on: September 28, 2013, 11:12:08 AM »
No need to apologize at all.

Just an interchange of ideas, and hopefully some different and unexpected insights.

I recently watched a movie on TED, where the change of the  level of happiness one year from now, for a lottery winner and someone that would lose their legs was compared.

Surprisingly, they found that there was actually no difference. If they were happy now, they would be happy one year from now. Similarly if they were sad (or unhappy) now, they would feel about the same one year from now, irrespective of which of the two scenarios they encountered..

That is what inspired me to start this thread, just citing the above observation as starting point.

I really don't think any one opinion is more significant than another, but the fact that different people have different opinions. Also, it probably is a very personal thing.

What makes me happy (or the sandcastle builder) could be totally insignificant to someone else.

But we have no idea about what these things are.

Hence the question initially.